When all seems lost...
Hello World,
I've been quiet. I know. 16 rounds of chemo and 4 more to go - it's been a long journey my friends. Finally, some light at the end of the tunnel...I'm having to make some difficult decisions, and it's not always easy to want to write. I know I should write, because it helps me process my thoughts and feelings. I've had to cope with complete hair loss and effects to my body due to chemo. I always joked that I would look like a bird. LOL. Well, I think I look more like Mr. Clean than a bird, but birds are cute so we'll stick to bird for now. hahaha.
Let me just say...this journey is hard. Extremely hard. Sometimes it's gets harder and harder to leave home. Some days I just want to lay in my bed and forget the world exists. Other days, I force myself to get up and live, because I know I have a purpose. A purpose I may not see clearly, but I trust God is carrying out in me. God always knows what you need when you need it. When I didn't expect my family to flood into Florida this summer, they have kept me active. They have encouraged me to keep getting out of bed each day. I couldn't be more grateful for their love and company. I know I'm not such a great host right now, but just having them here makes my heart warm. I love my family.
I'm also grateful for all of those friends who have been going out of their way to take me to my treatments. The circle of support that I have around me is astounding. Sometimes, I observe the other cancer patients that I see on a regular. Most people have at least one person, but there are some that go alone. It makes me sad and grateful at the same time. I just wonder...what would this journey have been like without my loved ones? Most of all, what would this journey have been like without God? It makes you feel compassion and sympathy for anyone going through a difficult time.
I have a tough decision to make by July 31st. I'm torn between many things. I know that I'll make the best decision for my physical and mental health. After all, things could always be worse. I just look at everyone and everything that surrounds me...and I pray for peace. No matter my decision, I pray for peace. Help me pray friends. May God guide me to do what He has planned for me.
In the meantime, I'll keep moving forward and fighting this battle against cancer with God's help. When all seems lost, He redeems us. I'm waiting for my redemption. I'm waiting for my miracle.
Love,
Dayse
I've been quiet. I know. 16 rounds of chemo and 4 more to go - it's been a long journey my friends. Finally, some light at the end of the tunnel...I'm having to make some difficult decisions, and it's not always easy to want to write. I know I should write, because it helps me process my thoughts and feelings. I've had to cope with complete hair loss and effects to my body due to chemo. I always joked that I would look like a bird. LOL. Well, I think I look more like Mr. Clean than a bird, but birds are cute so we'll stick to bird for now. hahaha.
Let me just say...this journey is hard. Extremely hard. Sometimes it's gets harder and harder to leave home. Some days I just want to lay in my bed and forget the world exists. Other days, I force myself to get up and live, because I know I have a purpose. A purpose I may not see clearly, but I trust God is carrying out in me. God always knows what you need when you need it. When I didn't expect my family to flood into Florida this summer, they have kept me active. They have encouraged me to keep getting out of bed each day. I couldn't be more grateful for their love and company. I know I'm not such a great host right now, but just having them here makes my heart warm. I love my family.
I'm also grateful for all of those friends who have been going out of their way to take me to my treatments. The circle of support that I have around me is astounding. Sometimes, I observe the other cancer patients that I see on a regular. Most people have at least one person, but there are some that go alone. It makes me sad and grateful at the same time. I just wonder...what would this journey have been like without my loved ones? Most of all, what would this journey have been like without God? It makes you feel compassion and sympathy for anyone going through a difficult time.
I have a tough decision to make by July 31st. I'm torn between many things. I know that I'll make the best decision for my physical and mental health. After all, things could always be worse. I just look at everyone and everything that surrounds me...and I pray for peace. No matter my decision, I pray for peace. Help me pray friends. May God guide me to do what He has planned for me.
In the meantime, I'll keep moving forward and fighting this battle against cancer with God's help. When all seems lost, He redeems us. I'm waiting for my redemption. I'm waiting for my miracle.
Love,
Dayse
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